[Locked Post: Mourning]

Guinevere sat in her room in the middle of the bed that was still mussed from her and...

She shook her head, tears slipping down her cheeks. She couldn't believe he was gone. Couldn't believe that she would never see those laughing black eyes undressing her. She tried to breathe, but it came out as a sob and she couldn't seem to control the sobs.

All she had ever wanted, ever, was for the ones she loved to be safe. Now, one was gone, and the other one...

She couldn't get herself to leave the room. It was the last place she had been with Lancelot.

" Tomorrow will come and then everyone will wonder why they made such a fuss."

Guinevere got up from the bed and wandered to the window. She looked out into the grounds and the field and felt nothing but the emptiness inside her.

." But I won't let them get close enough to scratch me."
"See that you don't."

She shook her head, still hearing everything that was said, still feeling him hold her.

He couldn't be gone. He just couldn't.

Guinevere turned to stare at the sword that was on her bed. It was glaring proof that her beloved was gone. He never would have released his grip on those swords unless he was dead. They went everywhere with him.

"Lancelot..." she whispered, tears streaming down her cheeks. In the room belonging to her and Arthur, she could grieve. Behind the locked door, she didn't have to be the Queen of Briton. She didn't have to be the Lady that everyone bowed to and expected certain things of. Behind the doors of this room, she was merely Guinevere.

And Guinevere had been torn apart inside.

She slid down the wall next to the window and brought her knees up as she sobbed into her hands. She had tried so hard to stay pulled together, but the ache in her chest just would not go away. Lancelot was dead and she and Arthur were going to be expected to carry on. They were going to be expected to do their duty and not let their emotions get to them.

She didn't want it. She didn't want this responsibility. She wanted to curl up and give into the pain that was threatening to overwhelm her right now. Lancelot was dead and she wanted to join him.

But that would leave Arthur all alone and she wouldn't do that. She would not do that to her love.

Guinevere buried her face in her knees as the tears kept flowing. She could still hear his voice.

" You're a fighter and you would have Arthur. Nothing will happen but if anything were to happen, you would survive and I would want you to. I would want you to keep on living."

Guinevere got to her feet and went to grab Lancelot's sword. She swung it around a few times before dropping to her knees. A loud scream was drawn from her throat again and again. Guinevere sat there on her knees for what seemed like hours...she held on to the sword like it was a lifeline and her eyes stared down at the floor as she started to sob again. It seemed like she had done nothing but cry since Arthur had brought her back to the garrison. Someone, she didn't know who, had helped her to her and Arthur's rooms and sat her on their bed...the bed that right now seemed much too empty. She screamed out her rage and grief until her throat ached and her voice was hoarse. The screams echoed throughout most of the fortress and chilled the blood of a great many of the people.

She held the sword to her as she rocked back and forth on her knees.

Lancelot was dead.

Arthur was somewhere.

And Guinevere was alone...her heart and spirit broken.